


Sincerely,

by Hock_hug



Series: 52 Weeks of Hockey [46]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: COVID doesn't exist for my sanity, Fluff, Letters, M/M, Playoffs mention, Poetry, TK Centric, Travis is in love, cute stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:48:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26246653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hock_hug/pseuds/Hock_hug
Summary: Travis started to write down his feelings
Relationships: Travis Konecny/Nolan Patrick
Series: 52 Weeks of Hockey [46]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1122324
Comments: 4
Kudos: 45





	Sincerely,

**Author's Note:**

> I'm still here! College sucks and I shouldn't have taken 18 credits this semester, but that's whatever. I hope y'all enjoy this, it was concocted out of nostalgia and sleep deprivation. Take care!

His therapist was the one to suggest it.

“Have you considered keeping a journal?” She had asked, leaning forward in her seat. “I think writing your feelings down might help you process them a bit better.”

Travis tried journaling for a while but it seemed too much like a chore to be helpful. He had a shelf in his room of half-filled notebooks that taunted him when he took the time to notice them. They came in handy when Travis began to develop feelings, though.

Nolan feelings, specifically. 

_ I can’t help but think of you _

_ as the sun goes down. _

Look, Nolan wasn’t a bad looking guy and anyone could see that, but only Travis got to see the secret smiles they shared on the bus or the quiet moments they spent leaning together on Travis’ kinda shitty couch. Only Travis got to be there when Nolan cooked for them and only he could clean up the burnt mess he left behind. Nolan was so beautiful in everything he did, it was only a matter of time before Travis caught feeling for him.

He realized it halfway through their first season together after a post-win celebration at a club. They were in an Uber going back to the hotel and even sober, Travis would have been enraptured by the city lights passing over Nolan’s face. His cheeks were soft and rosy with intoxication and his nose cast a running shadow across his face. He must’ve sensed Travis looking at him because he turned to meet Travis’s eyes and that was the moment that Travis decided that Nolan Patrick was the most beautiful being on the planet.

_ Of your rosy cheeks,  _

_ of your eyes, brighter than the stars. _

It wasn’t just his features, though. Nolan was beautiful inside and out. He always stopped to take pictures with fans, he had a soft side that only came out around children, and when Travis was upset he always knew how to help. There were a few times that Travis kept close to his heart.

_ Your laughter captivates the galaxy. _

Travis was pissed at himself and he was showing it. He walked into their apartment and slammed the door closed before tossing his bag on the ground. The day was bad, the trip they had just come home from was bad, and Travis had once again fucked up enough to lose ice time. Nolan was already getting changed and all he wanted to do was pass out. He dragged himself to the bathroom, brushed his teeth and went back to his room to change his clothes. He was just getting ready to pull back the covers when there was a knock at the door. He opened it to find Nolan awkwardly standing there. Before he could ask what was up, Nolan had his arms wrapped around Travis. Though his first instinct was to push Nolan away, Travis let himself melt into the hug. After what was probably too long to be a moment, he pulled away. Nolan straightened up and rolled his shoulders. 

“I can’t believe I have to bend down to hug you,” Nolan griped. “Why are you so short?”

“If you weren’t such a beanpole, you wouldn’t have that problem, bud.” Travis responded with a grin. Nolan laughed at him and all seemed right again. They bid each other good night and Travis spent the rest of the night sleeping peacefully.

_ Who am I, then _

_ to long for your embrace? _

Whenever these thoughts overflowed in his head, Travis wrote them down. Once he was done, he tore every sheet out and stuffed them into an envelope which remained in his bedside table. He had no interest in giving the envelope to Nolan. He wouldn’t do anything to screw up their friendship. 

_ I long for your presence _

_ steady at my side. _

It wasn’t until Nolan wasn’t there that Travis began doubting himself. Every moment spent away from Nolan was a moment he spent worrying about Nolan. He knew that the migraines were bad but he didn’t know how bad, and Nolan never let him stick around when they came. All Travis wanted to do was wrap Nolan in a blanket and protect him from the pain, but he couldn’t do anything to ease his friend’s pain and it ate him up inside.

_ I long for your smile _

_ And to see the way your hair flows. _

Nolan’s hair was greasy when Travis saw him before they left for the playoffs. Travis kept his distance and Nolan mumbled through his mask and it was so  _ different _ from what Travis was used to. He wanted to see Nolan smile and flick his hair, he wanted to see him blush as Travis gently ribbed him. It was a good thing that Travis learned that he couldn’t have everything he wanted when he was young.

_ My dearest, I long to tell you _

_ how much I adore you, _

Travis brought a notebook with him when he entered the bubble. He had a lot of free time to write, but he couldn’t seem to get his emotions on paper like he wanted to.

_ but these letters must suffice _

Nolan called when he could, and Travis savored every word that he spoke. After the good games Nolan would laugh and joke with Travis like they did when they played together. After the bad ones, he would reassure Travis and gently drag his spirits back up. When they FaceTimed, Travis could finally see his smile again and it was like the sun shining after a storm.

_ for I will never be the one  _

_ to tear a smile from your face. _

When Travis took to the ice, he knew he was playing for Nolan. He was playing for his smile, he was playing for his honor. Every shift he played was for Nolan, sitting at home alone, and he played with everything he had.

_ I love you. _

Even if they lost, Travis knew he had something to look forward to. No matter what happened, he still had Nolan, and Nolan would always have him, whether he knew it or not.

_ I will forever be yours. _

_ TK _


End file.
